On Romance

It has been a year since we committed to a romantic relationship. Between then and now, we have endured tiny to grand challenges that have shaped our bubble. A year is short compared to silver or gold anniversaries, but counting becomes insignificant compared to enduring.

Often, I cling to the memories, mostly documented and stored in my phone. The early stages of our conversation, the first photos we took in Siargao when we became official, our favorite places in Baguio, the worthwhile food and view in La Union, our ice cream hunting and noodles sharing at 7-Eleven at midnight, the coffee dates, and Bohol, recently, where we risked popping the bubble and founded our mending pattern for the worst times.

I learned that romance is an understanding to stay with your person in the bright and dark times. You are two different entities with incomparable challenges. When the other is struggling, stay around and talk for support. More often, presence is enough. When it comes to misunderstandings, set aside your pride and talk soon. Do not sleep with a heavy heart.

More than anything, romance has become a source of spice in my life. Troubles are on the side, but fun and vibrance dominate the bubble. I used to tell my friends I would be fine aging alone, but I take that back. It feels different now. My goals and plans have changed to accommodate another person in the house I have in mind. It has been warming. It feels nice to come home to your person and swoon with each other’s warmth.

Romance, I define now, is happiness that is incomparable to other temporary world things. It is with you on the commute to the office that makes work ahead feel bearable. It’s floating in the air to cheer you on when the task is heavy. It’s the motivation to do better for a comfortable shared future.

And it’s also a lot of fears, such as the unthinkable things that could happen when you are here while the other is there. And other forces that have the potential to trigger insecurities and madness. But, importantly, it’s the hope that even if the waiting is draining, you will reunite in no time. At the end of the sacrifice, the person you choose to share your triumphs and drains stands there with a big hug and more.

I have been lucky to meet someone who made it easy for me to trust in love again. And now that I know how it feels, I want all of it.